Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth.

Analyzing humor is like dissecting a frog. Few people are interested and the frog dies of it.

I can write better than anybody who can write faster, and I can write faster than anybody who can write better.

I'm desperately trying to figure out why kamikaze pilots wore helmets.

The only difference between me and a madman is that I'm not mad.

If you need more than five lines to prove something, then you are on the wrong track

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.

Physics is not a religion. If it were, we'd have a much easier time raising money.

The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good.

It's strange, isn't it. You stand in the middle of a library and go 'aaaaagghhhh' and everyone just stares at you. But you do the same thing on an aeroplane, and everyone joins in.